It's not you, It's me... seriously.

Why do I think anyone would be interested in this blog? It's all about me, my insecurities, my obsessions, my feet....

Karolina once told me that all my artwork was trying to say "look at me!". I was surprised and sort of hurt by that statement but she was right. At the time I didn't really see it but it was there. It's like this blog... my tiny attempt to say "look at me" on a global (and free) scale. Am I really that interesting? I don't know... I'm just normal (in a weird sort of way)...

I think my work tells stories about myself that are possibly too hard to write or talk about.... the way a musician sings to tell stories...

Okay, enough reflection. I'm off shopping. I am going to celebrate my mother by making myself happy... you know, happy daughter, happy family.

I may look at new running shoes for the beat he bridge run next week. In cycling class yesterday I got a compliment from the instructor... maybe all this work will improve the running considering I'm not in training....

Oscar Smoshcar!

This morning I woke up early to watch the announcement of the 2007 Academy Awards nominations. Unlike other years I didn't take notes... I figured staying horizontal while I watched it was a good thing.

I am happy to see that Juno as a movie and Ellen Page were both nominated.... I now have a list of movies that I would like to see. (maybe I'll make my lovely assistant Kristen go with me)...

those movies are - No Country For Old Men, There Will Be Blood and the Diving Bell and the Butterfly. I suppose there are others I could see (maybe Eastern Promises or Michael Clayton - but those first three are the top.).

On another note, I am thinking that I should start making some work... sometimes I think it would be nice to have a studio - but that costs money. I will be getting a paycheck this week... I find that I have mixed emotions about working - I have to work to earn money, but I find I don't have a lot of time to think about my other endeavors. I suppose things will be different in March (maybe)... I'm in a lull. I think I'm okay with that though. I don't really want to get stuck in one of those downward spirals that I get into sometimes.

Serenity now!

My meeting with Chad did much to ease my mind... I decided on frames and I ordered matt's for my prints, they should be ready on Saturday morning.... and I got a pretty good deal I think. I found this place online through city search. It's called One Stop Framing Shop on 36th and 8th.

The only thing that would make me feel better is if I would get paid for National Portfolio Day and I had a date. Okay, maybe just the getting paid part....

I have finished my last sign... I don't want to ruin it for you all so you'll just have to wait for tomorrow.

I'm a star!

Okay, maybe not a star but I did manage to get up at 6:15 and go to the gym. I need to start training for my next run. I need to sign up for something so I have something to look forward to AND so that I can do another recording. I've been non-art making for too long.

I think that's my main problem.

Now I need to see if I can find the finances to get my brows done and my haircut... then I'll be back to semi-normal.

Ummm...

I'm thinking that maybe I won't eat everything in sight today. I will try to keep everything in check... I will not let anxiety rule my life, I will not let other people bring me down...

Maybe I'll try to find a leash today and take Tucker out for a walk. She doesn't like to go on walks - she will just wait there until you drag her. She makes a good dust mop.

Last night at first Thursday was pretty low key. I saw a few things that I liked - Ron Lambert at the Catherine Person Gallery was pretty interesting. He works with video in sculptures.... there were some nice plaster forms with mylar and inkjet prints... the craftsmanship was nice.

The show at SOIL was called Crud. I will have to go back an look again at it... I think I liked it though.

When I was walking through the galleries I was trying to envision where my work might fit and I haven't quite figured that out yet. Actually my work will fit into Crawl Space just fine I think... I have to set up a studio visit with them.

Okay - it's official. This is my last week of sitting on my ass feeling sorry for myself. I have to start working again and applying for things. Two weeks is long enough for having a pitty party / vacation.

Okay, I feel better.

Reigning it in.

I need to regain some self control. I have succumbed to some of my favorite foods and now I need to toe the line.... I guess that's normal.

I've been waking up in the middle of the night thinking that I'm not here to stay... (it's a bit unsettling...)...

Yesterday my visit to the chiropractor was wonderful, my neck is much better and my hip doesn't hurt quite as much.

Last night I went to the opening of the University of Washington MFA show at the Henry Art Gallery. There's something to be said about University art as opposed to Art School art.... maybe it's the environment that it's in and the people who are there. The work was good.

I saw some of my friends and some professors... I really need to start working on things again... maybe today I'll do some audio recordings.

On the agenda today is my ww meeting, then I'm going to go to Pilgrim Firs for the afternoon for camp counselor training camp (which I don't really need, but I need to go to camp)... Tomorrow it's off to Olympia to see my nephews and celebrate Victor's birthday.

My poor little computer.

I had to take Old Crusty to the Apple Store yesterday. It's probably going to cost me 300 bucks to get her fixed... but what's another 300 bucks added onto grad school.

Guess what??? the school is charging us a $35.00 graduation fee. Like I have money falling out of my pockets.

I guess I'm going to have to change the title of the Blog after next weekend. If anyone has any thoughts about it let me know. I suppose it could just be called Jenerator's Rant but it sounds a bit sparse. Jenerator's Art World Rant.... Jenerator's find me a job Rant... Jenerator's reproduction challenge Rant... I guess I'll have to think about that one...

This afternoon I started packing up my studio... it's going to be a long process. I have a lot of stuff.

SIMON...if you read this part - I will send you pictures of stuff once my computer is fixed.

I'm feeling a bit of melancholy and nostalgia for my last week or so here... I'm a bit sad.. but happy as well.

Things on my to do list for Seattle.
Find a job.
Take walks.
Teach my dog how to walk on a leash (she doen't like doing that at all... but how am I going to attract single eligible men without her??? - yeah, I know... my sparkling personality!)
Hang out with my family.
Drive my car.
Visit my Chiropractor.
Visit Galleries.
Get a greek herb rotisserie chicken from Fred Meyer.
Learn how to fire a gas kiln.
Eat Spud fish and chips (in moderation).
Make art!

Oh Crap.

Well, maybe not crap... poo. I have to have this submission in for the show I'm in on Friday. I'm not sure exactly how I'm going to hang it though. It's a collage of color photo copies... If I can figure out how to hang it flush to the wall that would be ideal...

I'm trying to think of what I want for my birthday... postcards, business cards?? moving boxes? massage? a date? No, what I really need is a new computer, but the possibility of getting that is probably slim. What I really would like is for everyone I know who smokes to stop. (You know who you are...). That would be a great gift.

Flowers would be nice.

creak...

That's the noise my body made this morning when I got out of bed. I should get out and run today to test and see if my recording device works sufficiently.

I received an email yesterday from the curator that I sent my images to. She said If I was interested I could have a show at her gallery in Chicago next year (the skeptical part of me is thinking there's got to be a catch). She lives in Rome (ahhh Roma!) and has a gallery there as well. I'm waiting to hear back from a woman who is having a show there right now as to how it works. I'll wait to divulge more after I get more details.

Yesterday I was in a funk... I'm feeling better today though. I have to get things done today. I have to pick up my mounted and laminated images for the MFA show, finish up applications and get some homework done.

Last night my class heard Ernesto Pujol talk. He was very engaging.. I enjoyed what he had to say about his work. He's working on a project this summer in Boston where he is doing walks around different islands in Boston harbor. Maybe I'll fly to Boston to join him on a walk...

What's going on.

I had an advising session with Christine and a talk with Karolina yesterday about my work (and myself)... it was pointed out to me that basically I say "look at me" with everything... I guess I've always wanted attention (although I don't necessarily like to admit it)... it's just strange to have it pointed out to me. I think it's interesting and it is making me think a lot.

Christine brought up that a lot of my work (lately) is asking for judgment (approval???) by the viewer and it's a bit egotistical of me to be doing these things... (the Google project and the running...).

Things that make you go hmmmmm.

I've got to get my ass in gear...

I need to figure out how to do podcasts, work on my artist statements and start training. I also need to remember to have children.

I got the estimate for moving today. Not as much as renting a truck but still not cheap. It seems kind of wierd having a moving date... May 23rd. Part of me feels like I'm abandoning Chicago but there's the other part that really misses Seattle. Oh well, I'm sure it'll get worse before it gets better.

I must say though, that I am glad that I cleaned up my apartment. It's nice to come home to a nice clean(ish) place.

On Saturday there is going to be a Fibers get together... I'm taking the bottle of Grappa I picked up in Chianti... I also need to make some sort of tappas type thing. Any ideas?

Some things...

Okay, so I did get a few things accomplished today. I sent images and an artist statement to the curator who visited last week and I am working on cleaning up the apartment. I can't believe I'll be out of here in less than three months... yikes! So much to do so little time... The weather is getting better.... hopefully I can break out the shorts soon...

I've been having this crazy urge to run like the wind... I've bought an external microphone to plug into the digital recorder so I can record as I run. I think I mentioned the run to Wrigley in a couple weeks... I may have to sign up.

I've been thinking...

I should actually get some career type work done today. Working on submissions, artist statements, images etc... but there are some cute clothes on sale at Target. Oh the dilemma.

Yesterday at the race I received information on other races coming up. On March 31st there's the race to Wrigley... maybe I'll sign up. The motive is two-fold, one to get exercise and two to record my endeavors. I stopped my Radio Shack yesterday and looked at external microphones. there's a clip on one that I could get for $25.00... maybe I'll pick one up.

It would be nice to have firm thighs.

20290 steps...

In an effort to wear myself out today I ended up walking almost nine and a half miles. If I can do that I can run a 5k race tomorrow morning.

It's been a long day. Starting with work this morning and ending up here. I did get quite a bit accomplished today although I still need to finish my artist statement and send images to that curator. I did get my images sent off to be printed for the MFA show (at least I think they're going in the show). Maybe tomorrow after my long soak in an epsom salts bath I'll work on tieing up those loose ends.

On another note, I was thinking this evening about when the artistic bug hit me.... Maybe it was that pig mobile I made for my mom made out of tag board one year or the slip cast hen planter or the clay pig.. maybe it was all those Halloween costumes I made over the years: the one night stand, the disco inferno, the caesar salad, the coat of arms (although I did steal that idea from Luke Esser, along with the green with envy idea too...). Yeah, maybe it was the halloween costumes...

I did it.

I woke up at a reasonable time this morning. I've even started cleaning... I have movers coming over next week to give me an estimate on moving my things back to Seattle.

This morning I have been checking out the Seattle Art Blog (if I were more adept at HTML I would know how to do the link by heart but I don't.).

Through the blog I saw a nice blurb about my friend Isaac Layman by Regina Hackett (PI art critic). Isaac is a great photographer... he is one of my friends from my trip to Rome when I was an undergrad at the UW. There's a group of us who I think make interesting work, Chad Wentzel and Anne Mathern (to name a few). I'm looking forward to getting back to Seattle and putting what I've learned in grad school to work.

I think the most important thing I have learned is how to integrate my artmaking with my life. Before school they were two separate things.. now I think I can't really separate them.

Another piece of good news, they are going to do a publication of the show I was in last December so I have to pick some images and write about the piece.

Later on I am going to post images for my business card... I'd like you all to vote on your favorite so I can get them ordered.

Student work....

here is a link for the website for the classes I TA'd for this summer. (my name is in lights under the faculty page). I will post the individual images from the people in my classes.

Early College Program exhibit